I had a whole post written up about the death of my uncle the night before last, but I'm trying to make my journal more of a lighthearted place, so I think simply mentioning it is enough. He was the last remaining link to the people who raised me, and now that he's gone, my brother and sister and I occupy the positions of elders in my family. It's unfathomable, and the rest of my life to the visible horizon feels different already.

In other news - well, not news, since my flist is far ahead of me on this front, but [livejournal.com profile] lokifan's Love Meme is busy spreading joy and providing a chance to comment with fondness and admiration to friends and vaguely familiar names you know only from this one memorable fic or that beloved piece of art. I was very touched by the sweet words people left for me, considering I've been an unproductive member of fandom for a couple of years now (something I hope to change with [livejournal.com profile] hoggywartyxmas, because by God, I really like the fic I'm writing, and I want to do it justice for my recipient's sake <3). Go over there and scatter some love if you haven't already, or add your own name. Don't be shy. I'm a little behind on paying compliments, but I'll get there.

Lastly, I'd like to point you to a marvelous short comic on deviantArt, although I suppose I ought to warn the unwary that Snape/Dumbledore is one of my favorite pairings, and you'll get an eyeful by clicking the link. It's beautifully drawn, amusing and poignant by turns, with a sprinkling of winter and a dusting of romance. And I urge you to read the artist's tongue-in-cheek description of what the heck led to this unconsummated kiss.

A cringeworthy event by lifeofapottedplant. (Click on the image to enlarge it.)

From: [identity profile] perverse-idyll.livejournal.com

Thank you, Tetley. <3 I wasn't there when my uncle died, and I've noticed that not being able to say goodbye delays the sense of closure. (I first wrote "acceptance," but I don't feel very accepting.)

And I really do want to keep my journal more upbeat and creative. It seems to me the majority of my posts for the past few years have been whinge-fests. I was back-reading in search of a post I remembered writing a few years ago about fictional crushes, and the difference in tone from even three years back is disturbing. I used to be so much happier, and it shows. I used to indulge in silliness!

Work has been doing its best to keep me from using my brain cells. As a result, my Hoggywarty fic went from feeling like a Mondrian - this rectangle goes here, that square takes up too much room, this side needs a thick plastering of red - to feeling like my muse has gone all Jackson Pollack on me, and everything is smeared together and splashed with black. Neither approach is what I want.

I look forward to seeing the sock masterpiece once it's complete because I imagine it will exceed all prior socks and be granted the Dumbledore seal of approval. ;)


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